Karaminder Ghuman: ADHD and the Minimum Level of Chaos

Episode 8

July 26, 2022

This is episode eight. Today I'm meeting with Karaminder, who is a course creator, entrepreneur, and sort of a modern day philosopher. In this episode, we talk about some of his theories on how the human brain works and what his experience has been like with ADHD.

Show Notes

Guest:

Karaminder Ghuman

Sponsor:

Llama Life

Links and show notes:

Transcript

Karaminder Ghuman: I feel like there should be a, like an MLC, uh, which is the minimum level of chaos, that is required in our lives of just to feel, I guess. It's to tread water, if you will. The, the treading, the actual act of treading is like, is the chaos right? Whereas, okay, if the chaos dies down, then there is no more movement in the treading of water, then you are just actually sinking.

Jesse: Hey, my name is Jesse J. Anderson, host of the ADHD Nerds podcast. The show where we talk about living with ADHD, and have some fun along the way.

Jesse: This is episode eight. And if my audio sounds a little off, uh, that's because I forgot to record this intro before I left on vacation and I'm currently recording it in a hotel room. But don't worry, the rest of the episode should sound great. Uh, today I'm meeting with Karaminder, who is a course creator, entrepreneur, and sort of a modern day philosopher. In this episode, we talk about some of his theories on how the human brain works and what his experience has been like with ADHD.

Jesse: But first I'd like to thank our sponsor, Llama Life. Say goodbye to never-ending lists and hello to daily bliss. Llama Life is a perfect tool for managing time boxed working sessions. You can whiz through your monstrous to do list, finish your work on time, and get the things done that you said you would do. To get your free trial, go to adhdnerds.com/llama that's L L A M A and get started today. And you can save 20% by using the coupon code JESSELLAMA20. That's J E S S E L L A M A 2 0. Now let's get to the show.

Jesse: Thank you so much for being here, Karaminder.

Jesse: Uh, we've known each other for about, probably about a year now. Uh, we connected online just finding each other on Twitter and, uh, yeah, it's awesome to, uh, sit down and chat with you again today. Um, I'd love to start and just sort of hear your history with ADHD. When did you find out that you have it and what did that story look like?

Karaminder Ghuman: Wow. Okay. So official diagnosis was November of 2019. I've always heard about it, but I didn't. I just didn't, didn't wasn't exposed to anyone who had it or, the term was thrown around as someone, I don't know.

Karaminder Ghuman: What do you say as like someone who can't pay attention? And now I, now that I know better, what I thought was just ADHD is probably called like hyperactive. And by the way, that is not my. Diagnosis. Mine is inattentive. So I was with my ex at the time and she wanted to go to couples therapy, not cuz we're finding anything, but she just believed I was always wrong.

Karaminder Ghuman: Let's just put it that way. She just believed I was wrong. I'm like, hell yes. I've always wanted to have therapy. Like it was, it's actually been a dream of mine. Like I've, I'm like always thinking one day I'm like people talk about therapy. I would like to do that.

Karaminder Ghuman: But I, I, I kind of thought of it like a bit like a massage, right?

Karaminder Ghuman: Like, oh, it's nice to have a massage. And, uh, and that's kind of how I thought about it and treated it. So any the moment it came up, I'm like, yes, yes, let's do it. Let's do it. And then, uh, I could tell my ex was a little frustrated through the sessions because she. clearly had expectations. she didn't like it, that, that.

Karaminder Ghuman: The therapist would say things like, well, like he's all good to go. Like, you know, very flexible and everything. So what what's really the problem here.

Karaminder Ghuman: And that, that's what the you know, therapist would give us exercise, I'd do the exercises. She wouldn't. Uh, and then finally, like the, the therapist, I think, I forget which session she said. She said, I don't think she was like properly. How do you say like the right credentials in which she could diagnose me? But she says that a lot of the patterns I exhibited or that was discussed is. Synonymous with ADHD. And so therefore I should seek out. And these, these are keywords guys. These are keywords, seek out an evaluation keyword, number one from a psychiatrist, keyword, number two, being very specific, not, not, uh, psychologist, but psychiatrist.

Karaminder Ghuman: And I forget all the medical. Like requirements that are associated with these words, but apparently psychiatrist does have a medical degree and can prescribe medication. And I think that makes it proper. So I then started hunting on the internet and of course, any psychiatrist near me, I would call and even their website would say, yeah, we're taking new patients.

Karaminder Ghuman: You call. And they're like, Nope, no patients.

Karaminder Ghuman: No patience for you. No patience, no new patients it's like that one Drake song, no new friends. It was except no new patients. All right. No patience. And that was quite frustrating. So frustrating. It like, I felt a little depressed. I felt a little beaten down by it like, this is so frustrating.

Karaminder Ghuman: And then I could actually, I don't know why, but I felt my, a ADHD got to be worse and worse and worse. And what I mean by that is it's that sense and feeling of being always feeling constantly behind and the overwhelm. And I write about this. I write about this on my, on my blog. I call it, uh, the piece is called my Everest pursuit of normal.

Karaminder Ghuman: Just for me to be normal was, was like climbing Everest. Now I should say I've not climbed Everest. But it's I imagine it to be so, uh, and it was probably the biggest challenge in my life just to get to normal if you will.

Jesse: Hmm.

Karaminder Ghuman: Uh, and I know that I use that because once I finally found a psychiatrist and the only way I found one is because at the gym I went to, there was a fellow doctor who worked out with, with us and it was like group, group, uh, group classes, type of thing. And I was just kind of like, so exasperated, I was just like, do you, do you know anybody?

Karaminder Ghuman: Do you, you have any sort of connections, any sort of like friend you went to college with that you barely speak to and you probably forgot their last name, just anybody. And goes, Hmm, gimme your phone number and I'll call you back or I'll message you in like a week or so. And like, I think it took out to be two to three weeks.

Karaminder Ghuman: And she got me in with somebody who, who was not taking on new patients. It was, you know, November towards the end of the year. And she was going to take on new patients at the beginning the year, but took me on, did my evaluation. And I think, I think I was pretty textbook as far as like what I shared. And this was, it wasn't any really conflict within this person I could tell of.

Karaminder Ghuman: Is he, or isn't he meaning me? Uh, I, I totally was. So she put me on meds.

Jesse: Do you, do you remember like what sort of things you were telling her? Like when she was like, Hey, Hey, here you are today. You, you might think you have ADHD. Like, why do you think that, like, do you remember kind of what that was like and what kind of things you shared?

Karaminder Ghuman: I know that she was trying to dig, dig questions as far as, um, is this now, or is this in the past or has this been a pattern of behavior? And I'm like, no, no, this, this is actually, I can connect the dots now looking back and it's always been there and this is what I perceive as normal. And I'm only knowing now realizing or learning that it is not based on. little research I've done since the time that this couple's, uh, therapist said that she had a hunch about me and I'm like, okay, started looking to a little bit more. And then, and then I've always like Jesse, when I was young and I had moved around a lot, like I tell slightly from my accent that comes and peaks up.

Karaminder Ghuman: I'm born in England. I was born in London, right. Born in London and grew up there. So I was 10 years old and then moved to California and even still in these schools, uh, we moved around a little bit in the Bay Area. So I had a few different schools I was going to, but I always, I always wanted to be part of the, I forget the name of the, like the advanced, smarter kids group gate.

Karaminder Ghuman: I think it was called gate. I don't remember, but I always wanted to be part of that. And I'm like, ah, I guess I'm not smart enough. And now come to find out only the beginning of last year. Did I realize that I, The beginning of this year that I was 2E.

Jesse: Oh.

Karaminder Ghuman: I learned what that is. I didn't know what that was just for.

Karaminder Ghuman: So literally I learned this year at the age of, well, at the time I was 40 I'm 41 now, cause I had a birthday high birthday to me. Woo woo. That, that I was that I have two E meaning twice exceptional. That's what the E means. And that. You are gifted, but that you have something else. They usually say disability.

Karaminder Ghuman: I don't like that word that you have something else that masks your giftedness. So in my case, my intelligence is there, but my ADHD masks it because I don't like to do homework. I don't, I'm super smart. I like I do well in tests, but I don't, I don't do homework so tedious. Um, yeah,

Jesse: That was, that was, that same, same here. I didn't, I never, I basically didn't do any homework, but I did really well on tests.

Jesse: So it was like, I, I could squeak by, I would get like C's and I'm like, well, that's good enough, cuz or it depended on the teachers. Some teachers would like, you know, weigh the test a lot higher and then I'd get A's in those classes. Cause I always, I always tested really well, but I didn't, I just didn't do any homework at all.

Jesse: And so yeah, that definitely kind of held me back from doing any sort. Yeah. Advanced placement or like gate, or I think here they have like a Quest program. Like anything like that once I got to about junior high or later was like, well, that's never gonna happen cuz I don't do homework anymore. So I'm just sort of stalled in that area.

Jesse: Yeah.

Karaminder Ghuman: Yeah. Some students are straight A's. I was straight C's. Like you were too.

Jesse: Pretty much. Yeah.

Karaminder Ghuman: A straight, I'm a straight C student, welcome to the straight C society. That's what I would start. That would be great. Uh, but so yeah, that, that's kind of like the, the origin story, if you will. And I remember what I said to my therapist, the, the, like the first appointment, which was like 30 days after my diagnosis and getting meds.

Karaminder Ghuman: And told her this the first, this is the first sentence. When I sat down, I said,

Karaminder Ghuman: This feels like cheating.

Karaminder Ghuman: As in, when I took the meds, I was able to do everything I wanted to do, which was, that is a very strange feeling to me because there's lots of things I wanna do, Jesse. Uh, but I can't do them. Like the brain won't let me the, like, I need the dopamine, uh, or the, the, the, what do you say the lethargy is real.

Karaminder Ghuman: And, uh, I remember, I think it was like day two or day three. completely changed around my room. Like I, I had actually written out. And measured everything and drawn it to plan, drawn it to scale. Even of like that way.

Karaminder Ghuman: I know I could pre-move things and figure out on paper and figure out if they were gonna fit or not. And then, uh, I've even, I even sometimes I'd take it into sketch up, uh, when redesigning a room, just so I know, like in a, in a 3d space where things will fit and how things will be as far as a flow, as far as like how, you know, to walk around.

Karaminder Ghuman: Being able to visually see and lay out things, especially in say 3d helps with, I guess helps with, I, I say 4d thinking right?

Karaminder Ghuman: Of like thinking things through and then understanding, okay. What are the new set of problems that this, that could arise from this configuration or this, uh, situation. But, I basically just did it cuz I've never had, and I can say this, I've never had the ability to do something without thinking about it. Okay. And I am writing a book, uh, about our kind of brain types in the world. in one of the, one of the frameworks I'm I see is I see that there's a spectrum or a. Yeah, Spectrum's good. Right? Cuz it's from one end, I like to call Kamakazi and the other end is perfectionist.

Karaminder Ghuman: Okay. And we all kind of like, I even see not neurotypical folks as well, fall along somewhere on this, um, on this path. But I do see that the neurotypicals are like huddled in the center. They're a little bit more balanced than the neurodiverse. Whereas the neurodiverse we could be in the center, we could be also on the fringe. and when, I mean, Kamikazi, Kamikazi is just another word I'm using for, uh, impulsivity now, no disrespect to the Japanese who this is, the word comes from them, right. Their pilots. But I, I only use the word Kamikazi in the sense of that to do things without thinking, uh, the, that kind of level of impulsivity, which I'm newly married.

Karaminder Ghuman: Definitely see that in my wife, oh boy. And whereas I know that I'm closer to the. perfectionist side of things where, you know, the, the planning side of things. And the way I see things is that, uh, as I get better about just not being so perfectionism, I'm pushing away from perfectionism to push, to get closer to the center.

Karaminder Ghuman: Whereas my wife has to push away from impulsivity and like proper communication and things like that. So she's pushing away from that end of the spectrum to get more towards center. But I do see that like this as a pattern of us that, Just in, just in terms of those are like polar opposites, if you will, Where do you feel? You feel you lie on this spectrum of, you know, Kamikazi to perfectionist.

Jesse: Yeah. Uh, definitely on more of the Kamikazi or impulsive side. I, I feel like a lot of the times I say my, kind of my normal mode of functioning is juggling chainsaws. Like I'm basically like it's, it has to be risky and sort of intense and like moving and when it starts to get boring, uh, I just add another chainsaw.

Jesse: Um and so it's just like keeping it, keeping that chaos. Like, I feel like the chaos really drives me and that's. Uh, for me, how I get stuff done is adding more chaos. And then eventually it does. I mean, juggling chainsaws, isn't gonna be pretty when it finally collapses. Um, and that's, so I know I basically kind of am trying to keep collapse at bay as long as I can.

Jesse: but I also know that I can't just set down the chainsaws. Cause if I do that, then it's going to it. Like my momentum stops completely. And so then like to do anything is like this Herculean effort to like get moving again. And so I like kind of have to constantly stay in motion. Otherwise I get myself into real trouble.

Karaminder Ghuman: No, I get that. Uh, I feel like there should be a, like an MLC, uh, which is the minimum level of chaos. That is required in our lives of just to feel, I guess, it's to tread water, if you will. The, the treading, the actual act of treading is like, is the chaos right? Whereas, okay, if the chaos dies down, then there is no more movement in the treading of water, then you are just actually sinking. and of course, then when there's too much treading, then you're actually flailing and then you could find yourself sinking again because. There's like the idea is that there's this equilibrium or, uh, balance point of actual, you know, effort of, of movement to tread. If you will, to, of treading water, to, uh, keep your head above it.

Karaminder Ghuman: I made it up right now on the fly. I've never thought of this before.

Jesse: I think it's, I think it works. That's a good, good analogy.

Karaminder Ghuman: But I like that, that MI MLC, that minimum level of chaos, uh, I observe that myself where I, I, I see a therapist twice. It's great guys, this is the best. And I know that the fundamental reason I see a therapist is for her to tell me I am not crazy, that's it? all it is like, Hey, I got these ideas, this or these things happen, da da, or this situation.

Karaminder Ghuman: And then basically I just listen for, you're not crazy. And I feel good. And then I keep going all my life. Uh, and I bring that up because I'll, I'll ask her about. I just, just, I just don't wanna lose this. We're just talking about it. Um, oh, that I'm more productive when I'm in a course and I don't have enough time than when I'm not in a course and have a lot of time.

Jesse: Mm mm-hmm

Karaminder Ghuman: And I think that's also part of the MLC, the, the minimum level of chaos.

Jesse: Yeah. I mean, for sure that las- last year I did the ship 30 for 30 writing course, which really kind of started me, you know, talking more publicly and writing about ADHD stuff. And I got more done during that first month in that course, which was chaos. Like, I don't know how I was writing like every single night for 30 days.

Jesse: But I got more done during that month than any other month, the rest of the year, even though I was continuing to create stuff afterwards, like yeah. Being kind of that, there's something about, I mean, there's a reason that cohort courses are really starting to take off because like, it, it, it really captures kind of like the best parts of the classroom and gets rid of all of the awful stuff of the classroom, because in like a cohort based course, Everyone there is there because they want to be there.

Jesse: Not because like they have to be there. And so everybody's excited about what they're doing and whatever the topic is. You're all kind of, like-minded and just kind of on the same page. And then that drives you to continue doing stuff and it's yeah. There's like this chaos. Like, it felt like I never had enough time to write the essays.

Jesse: Cause I was, it was writing a short essay every single night for 30 days. And there was like almost, almost not a single day in there that I feel like, ah, that was easy. I had plenty of time to do that every time I'm like, oh my gosh, I gotta get this done frantically so I can, uh, get to sleep because I always did it like at the end of the day, which was not the best plan.

Jesse: Um, but yeah, I totally agree. There's something about that. Chaos of not having enough time to do something. That really drives a lot more productivity and, uh, creation that way.

Karaminder Ghuman: yeah. And, but the thing is, it's also not sustainable. Like, you know, it's 30 days, it has a timer on it 30 days. And if it. it's about setting expectations. Cuz if they said, oh, this is gonna be a hundred days of writing, you're like, okay, I'm gonna get really gear up for this a hundred days.

Karaminder Ghuman: Um, then, then you've set the expectation of a hundred days. But if it's 30 and you like what happened on day 31? Jesse,

Jesse: day 31. I took a day off and then I didn't. No. Yeah, I didn't write. And then I didn't write again for like several weeks. I like, I was able to get back into it, but yeah, I was like the day, once I took that break, then I was just like, all the it's gone, like all the, and I wanted to write, like I wanted to take a day off and then get back to writing.

Jesse: And then I just like, didn't for. and that same sort of thing has happened with writing my book, like writing my book has been very much like, you know, fits and starts where I'll have like, I'll have like three weeks where I'm like cranking out stuff I'm writing so much every single day and feeling like I'm in it.

Jesse: And then I don't know. I'll do something and feel like I deserve a

Karaminder Ghuman: Six month break.

Jesse: Yeah.

Karaminder Ghuman: Yeah. Six month break.

Jesse: yeah.

Karaminder Ghuman: months break. Sounds good. Right. Right. And then the thing is that hap that conversation happens in the subconscious that you're not aware of. And, uh, and then the conscious brain is just like, I just need a break.

Jesse: Yeah. Uh huh.

Karaminder Ghuman: Oh, I'm with you. I'm dealing something with right now, Jesse, that I took a, well, it's not as bad as six months, but it's still been like four and a half, almost five months.

Karaminder Ghuman: And I'm like now, but now it's like my life's. like I have to do this is, this is all I have to do. I have to do this. I cannot let this, uh, say fester.

Jesse: Right. The thing that I found that really kind of got me back into it because I hit, I started writing my book last August, and then I got to about, uh, it was probably around November-ish that I stopped. And then I didn't write anything basically for like three or four months. And the thing that kind of like, re-energize it for me is I started, I, I basically set a goal of like, okay, I'm gonna.

Jesse: This to some beta readers. So I got a list of beta readers. And then once I had that of like, oh, whatever I have is going to out to my beta readers in two weeks, then it was like, oh man, well, what I have right now is garbage. So I have to fix all this before I let anybody see it. And so that was really what kind of like lit the fire again and got me back into it.

Jesse: And then I was really productive and I got the, you know, copy out to the beta readers. And then I've basically done that since. So like I, beta readers gave me their feedback. I went through it and it was great. And then I paused for a little bit, and then I set a new goal of like, okay, I'm gonna release a new draft to beta readers by this date.

Jesse: And then that would help motivate me. To so I'm almost, I'm, I'm, I'm like making up these deadlines, but because there there's beta readers, I'm telling people the deadlines. So it's, so my brain isn't able to just be like, ah, it's not a real deadline. We're gonna ignore it. It's like, no, no I've told people.

Jesse: And so I have to do it now. Um, and that's really been the thing that's helped me get this book moving because I want to get out. I want it to be done, but man, it's a lot of work. So like creating these deadlines with some external accountability has really been sort of a driving force for. That my

Karaminder Ghuman: And as you say that I'm looking at my own forced deadline, which is coming up in two days and I have stuff to do the work, but it it's the deadlines. Why is it that, you know, the quote, if it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.

Jesse: right.

Karaminder Ghuman: Right. It's it's true. Jesse, the stress, the stress is nuts. Okay. Like it's we have to figure out, I feel like that's why that's the biggest life puzzle that, uh, all of us ADHD people have is just, and we're all unique. So. My, my answer is may not work for you or you tried it and it doesn't work for you. And that's okay.

Jesse: All, we all have own, uh, unique brands, our own unique ways of dealing with, uh, ADHD. For sure. Like, I, I find people there is no like absolute truth in what ADHD looks like, because it's.

Jesse: Peppered and like changed through how you grew up and there's all sorts. There's all sorts of factors involved. I was just talking with somebody today, um, or actually on a previous episode where I was talking with Nic Nieblas and we were talking about how for me, I always have to have sound going. Like my brain is like, it's, it's like I have.

Jesse: My brain needs all these things to pay attention to, and I have to like give it something so that I can focus on the thing I want to focus on. So I'm gonna give it this music playing. So I'm gonna have music playing in the background, and then I'm able to focus on something else at the same time. So like music that, you know, doesn't have lyrics or anything.

Jesse: And Nick was saying, um, well, he, he does music sometimes, but he said for him, Silence is ideal. Like he doesn't want any sound happening at all. Um, which is totally the opposite Like silence sounds like torture. Like I would not enjoy having no sound at all. And I think that's just, that's just like one example of there's so many different things about ADHD that are really diverse from brain to brain.

Jesse: Um, like diverse is the thing like we're neuro divergent or neurodiverse because our brains are so unique in all these different ways. And there's no. There's no clean answer of like, this is what ADHD brain is like. Um, cuz it there's so many factors kind of involved in that.

Karaminder Ghuman: Yeah. Um, again, I have a theory i, I do have, I guess my unique point of view on this, where, okay, I'm gonna go back to what I think, what I believe is our kind of like life quest one is to get away from the stress, right? Like how do we live a life where, either we enjoy the things we were doing last minute, or we just kinda eliminate the things we don't enjoy and getting away from the stress.

Karaminder Ghuman: So we're still gonna have it, right? This is very much like the, uh, uh, Nassim Talib

Karaminder Ghuman: Or Talib I forget how to pronounce his last name, uh, anti antifragile or antifragility concept theory concept. I like concept because no, your good and bad is going to happen to you. And therefore, what is your disposition throughout that?

Karaminder Ghuman: Right? It's kinda like that.

Jesse: Mm-hmm

Karaminder Ghuman: Not letting like the big, bad, negative things get you down, but for me, it's it was, it's always been about getting rid of reducing the stress and being present. Right. And I collect little things that always help me, little things like quotes that help me with understanding what happiness is and what it looks like.

Karaminder Ghuman: Uh, like one, I love that people always I'm surprised not many people have heard of. I'm always surprised when people heard this one is, um, happiness is wanting the things you already have see was that so bad was that you're like, whoa, that's pretty, that's pretty righteous. Yeah. Cause. Um, we're, we're, we're afforded the pursuits of happiness.

Karaminder Ghuman: We are not guaranteed it. And then I even have a piece written on my own, on my blog about innocuous propaganda. And that is a piece about kind of things that are disguised as life advice, but that actually keep us from happiness, from our happiness, our own happiness. Um, and I give examples of like how breakfast was essentially breakfast was a marketing invention because one of the clients, Kelloggs, wanted to sell more cereal and they went to the Madmen on Madison avenue and they came up with slogans like breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Uh, I mean, same, very similar story to. pork industry and they wanted sell more bacon and they came up with bacon and eggs. Like that is an, that those three words is a came from marketing.

Jesse: Mm-hmm

Karaminder Ghuman: And even in my culture, I'm, I'm Punjabi Northern Indian that's. I was born in London, but my parents are both Punjabi.

Karaminder Ghuman: Um, and, and our food in our culture, food, we don't have a concept of breakfast. Like there is no breakfast foods and if you actually zoom out and take a look. Why is it that Americans and I'm, I'm an American. I have a passport. I can say this. Why is our breakfast actually? And I say this as someone who loves, oh, my God loves a waffle.

Karaminder Ghuman: Oh my God. I love a waffle, a nice Belgian waffle. Oh yes. I mean, I, I, I can say this as somebody who, who loves it and who totally like, Hey, other people are doing it too, so I'm gonna do it as well. Um, so that guy too, but also like, yeah, our breakfast, most of it is essentially dessert That's my that's like one example, even, uh, even the idea of home ownership. And it's, I believe from the fifties, because there's lots of space, there was a boom in making homes. And so kind of making this dream that like you should move out and you should own your own piece of Americana. And now it's kind of one of these things.

Karaminder Ghuman: We, we, if we don't have it, then we consider ourselves failures and I don't believe. So, this is what I mean by innocuous propaganda. It could be little things that you internalized and now have your own self expectations of, but you don't have to do that.

Karaminder Ghuman: I think I know for me, and this is again, we're all unique and I've met so many other people that also neurodiverse and, and. Each of us have our own unique things. But for me, I know my values and I know what I deeply care about. And that is, that is connection. That is the time I spend talking with you on this podcast. The time that we actually, not many people know this, but we've actually met and I really enjoyed the time we spent together. And for me, that's, that is, let's say the, uh, the, the juice of life as if life was a fruit, you juiced it and what would come out, you know, the juice, uh, that is for me, the juice of life is, is connection. And so I fight for that.

Jesse: awesome. Well, I think that that's a, uh, that, uh, this is a great time, I think, to switch over, to, uh, wrap up the show with our shiny objects. so shiny objects is, uh, the part of the show where we talk about, uh, one or two things that have been kind of entertaining our brains lately.

Jesse: Something you wanna recommend, whether it could be a book or a show, or just a hobby you're really into, uh, right now, uh, we're gonna show any object has been, uh, yeah. Prominent in your life, uh, lately.

Karaminder Ghuman: Okay, good. This will connect back to what I just So one of the, my COVID projects that I've, that I've put together, uh, over it took me over a year is a home cinema. And I like using the word cinema because that's what we would call place. What theaters in America, in England we'd call it cinema because the theater is where you go to, to watch a. but that's Americans, that's fine it's what they call it, but I call it a home cinema. And, uh, it's a Craigslist home cinema, Jesse, the finest in, uh, used goods that I could find on Craigslist. I should tell you, uh, and the, like I have a specific, um, I really love Bang Olufsen products, the way they're designed and the way they sound, uh, especially the older ones, cuz the new ones will hurt my wallet greatly.

Karaminder Ghuman: Like so greatly, but, uh, this way I like the older stuff. I like being able to resurrect things and, and that's part of the project. Part of the fun as well is piecing it together, finding what's available and always, always kind of hunting for those deals and like being like first mover advantage type of things.

Karaminder Ghuman: So that's, that was kind of the fun during COVID two piece together, a. Like surround sound. It's still not done. I'm I'm I trying to get into an aura 3d, which is a European, very popular Europe, kind of, uh, speck of surround sound, then up mix my atmos to it. If you go to, if you ever watch any of the, uh, home theater people on YouTube, there's a whole home theater, YouTube area, people

Jesse: Yeah, I try, I try to guard my wallet and stay away from that stuff because I know absolutely would suck. Suck me in

Karaminder Ghuman: Why you think I ha why you think I'm hanging out on Craigslist? Because the wallet, right. That told it's a wall, it's a Craigslist theater. Even the seats, I've always loved these, um, specific design within reach, uh, flight recliner, seats, but they're very pricey. They're like 4k each. So when I find them on used, I get them down to like, I find them and hopefully they're in my range of, let's say about 300 ish.

Karaminder Ghuman: Some have gotten less. I think one, I paid three 50. I got three of them. Different colors. Took me over a year and a half to find three, but that is like the first row, the front row of my cinema. And then the back rows, like seats. I just had laying downstairs, but got them on risers. So basically I'm trying to tell you, I built a home cinema,

Karaminder Ghuman: but not for, just for me, but for my family, for.

Karaminder Ghuman: Uh, everyone to sit down and enjoy. Cause I love watching. I love experiencing films. Like do you ever think Jesse? Why, why is it that we watch films re again, we already know what happens, but why do we watch things again?

Jesse: Uh, I, I feel like the reason I watch, uh, movies, again, that I've already seen is to, to relive the feeling that it gave me the first time around like that. There's something about film touch can touch you deep inside and like the best films. Carry that through watching it again, you get that feeling again, like it remains true, uh, with, even with repeated viewings, even though, like you said, you know, it's coming, but it's still, there's something about like really good art that can just touch you, uh, and really impact you the same way, um, over and over again.

Jesse: Yeah. That

Karaminder Ghuman: You hit it right in the head. It is to it's to reexperience feelings and to reexperience the feelings we had when we first watched it for the first time.

Karaminder Ghuman: So as long as we're in, you know, we watched it under good situations when we're experiencing like a sad part of life, we probably don't want to, or at least maybe it helped us get through it, but yeah, we re we want to re-experience our feelings.

Karaminder Ghuman: So that's why I, I, you know, I think my family, we all love, I love cinema. I love that. So building that, and now let's talk about the shiny things is I think there's, we have a, this year has been a great blessing for actually really good cinema. Um, one of which did not take place in my cinema, in my home cinema.

Karaminder Ghuman: It was actually recently it is of, it's a new top gun movie. It's a new top gun Maverick. Right. But here's the thing.

Karaminder Ghuman: Yeah. You can watch it in IMAX. yeah. You know what you need to watch it in, which is the way I watched it. You need to watch it in a 4d X cinema that is four Delta. X-ray four D X.

Karaminder Ghuman: What is 4d X? Well, go to YouTube. You'll find it but I'll tell you anyway,

Karaminder Ghuman: it's a seats that can. Can physically move there. I guess they're on, there are on controlled I'm I'm assuming hydraulics that's. I mean, I'm not a light dude, so it's a lot of mass to move and there's four seats in like one say module where it can, um, pitch forward.

Karaminder Ghuman: It can yell. It can, um, Rotate it. And it's got also like little butt kicker transducers in the seat. It's got vibration, it's got even little compressed air around your neck and your feet. It's got fans inside the cinema. It's got strobes as well. It's got smoke and fog in the front. Uh, if it's raining, there's effects for rain, there's also effects for water right in your face, if applies for it.

Karaminder Ghuman: And what better way to experience any film where you can also kind of feel and mimic the movement on screen than freaking Top Gun. And I have yet, I was waiting to experience a movie in 40 X cuz it was a recent addition to my theater and I was like, Spider-Man no, we watched it IMAX. But when, but with top gun I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no. this is it. This is the moment we're all gonna go. We're all gonna experience it. And that Jesse I'll tell you what, it's a two hour thrill like a literal thrill, like ride. As in I brought my aunt who's visiting from London and, uh, you know, we got the large popcorn and she was holding onto that popcorn, trying to keep it contained for dear Poor thing. I wish I wish the seat had a seatbelt. I think she would've felt more secure, but she, but at the end of. Uh, so I took, I took my wife, I took my mom, I took my aunt and all three of them were giggling like school girls at the end. they

Jesse: Mm-hmm

Karaminder Ghuman: This enormous, uh, rush of, of a adrenaline of just this feeling of just everything together.

Karaminder Ghuman: So that is one. That is number one. Okay. Go. If you can see it. Wait a second. This is gonna come out many months later, right? Oh

Jesse: Yeah, that's all right.

Karaminder Ghuman: Something less timely. Oh dear. All right. Fine. Fine. Next shiny object is you can actually probably still watch this, uh, on Netflix, cuz it is on Netflix right now.

Karaminder Ghuman: And it's a film called R R R and it is from the Tollywood area. Uh, Tollywood in film industry, which means it's the Telugu and Tamil film industry of India. Now I'm of Punjabi, um, Northern India, which is Bollywood is a movie industry there cuz Bombay Hollywood Bollywood. There you go. And uh, but oh my God, R R is a feast for the eyes, Jesse and uh, I've never seen a, a Hollywood film.

Karaminder Ghuman: It is three hours, 10 minutes long, just so you know, but it doesn't feel that way. Oh, this is the best movies. Don't let, don't let you feel it. And I was shocked at, uh, I guess I'm gonna say this, white people reviewing movies, YouTube. Industry cuz it's, it's a industry in its own there, uh, that they fell over like gushing over nuts over this film.

Karaminder Ghuman: Like really? Why people. Okay. Okay. Why are people excited about I'll let's check it out. Let's do it. And we did watch that in the home cinema and my goodness. What a feast, what a wonderful expression of cinema, what a, everything that is fun about cinema, if you will. Uh, it's not, it's not Shawhshank here. It's not trying to like be real.

Karaminder Ghuman: No, no, no, no, no. This is, it's like a, it's like a bit of a Marvel movie, a bit of like, woo shoo, like, uh, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon with the, with the bombastic nature that is Tollywood and Tollywood just takes things from Bollywood as well. Not just takes things, but like it amplifies it like turns it up to Spinal Tap 11.

Karaminder Ghuman: Uh, and it's just. A wonderful experience. Um, yeah. That's that's yeah. It's that, and the biggest, the best thing is to share this with others. That's All right. Let's wrap it up.

Jesse: That's great. Uh, I wanna, I'm gonna do my shining object real quick. I had one planned, but I'm gonna pivot. Uh, based on you talking about your, in-home, cinema, So my wife and I just saw, uh, everything everywhere all at once.

Jesse: And that is a movie that really, uh, hit me and gave me a feeling. And that's when I cannot wait to watch again. A very strange movie if you've never seen a movie by Daniels, um, which is the two, the two direct writers and director, uh, writers and directors of the movie. Um, they both, their first name is Daniel.

Jesse: And so they've previously have done movies like Swiss army man, which is one of the weirdest movies you'll ever see. Um, but I'm, I'm kind of a fan of weird movies, um, when they're done really well and Daniel's movies are done extremely well. Um, but everything everywhere all at once, I think there's almost really.

Jesse: And ADHD undertone to it as well. Um, because the there's a, the main character is somebody who imagines all these things that she could have done with her life. She has like a million hobbies because there's all these things that she wants to do. And then the movie really just, it goes kind of off the deep end, exploring that like what if these alternate realities that she could have lived?

Jesse: And I won't go more into it more than that, but it's so good.

Karaminder Ghuman: I'm watching Saturday. I'm watching a Saturday in the home

Jesse: Okay. Awesome.

Karaminder Ghuman: the home cinema. I'm waiting till Saturday. Well, today. Tuesday, if you must know for those recording and listening at home, uh it's because my brother comes home and that is, uh, just the Eve of his birthday, but we'll watch it then.

Karaminder Ghuman: And we'll watching it together again, that together

Jesse: awesome. So you'll have to, you'll have to let me know what you think of it. Cuz I, I was floored by, I love it. One of my. One of my new favorite movies of all time. Um, so yeah,

Karaminder Ghuman: Expecting it to be I'm expecting it to. I guess be this generation's Matrix. I feel weird saying this generation cause matrix was generation. What are you talking

Jesse: I felt the, I mean, I, while watching the movie, I was reminded of the way that I felt watching the Matrix in the theater, it had that sort of like. Oh, this is a moment. This is like, this isn't just any old, like, I don't want build up the expectations. So then you see it and are disappointed, but it had that same sort of vibe of like, oh, this is something wholly unique.

Jesse: That's never really been done in cinema before. Uh, and I loved it, but yeah, let's go, let's go ahead and wrap up. Why don't you, uh, quickly tell people where they can go to follow you and kind of see, uh, things that you're doing online.

Karaminder Ghuman: Okay. So I think first thing, Jesse and I enjoy Twitter. So follow me. I'm I'm @karaminder that's Kilo Alfa Romeo Alpha Mike India November Delta Echo Romeo. Also, please learn your NATO alphabets. Ladies, ladies, gentlemen, If you can find me using my first name, you can find me anywhere. So my blog that I talked about with the articles that I I've written, which, uh, definitely every single article has something to do with ADHD, whether I mentioned it or not, it just uh, that, that karaminder.com for that.

Karaminder Ghuman: Yeah, Twitter Karaminder, and then what I was gonna tell you is that I have what I believe Jesse is that I'm what I'm building now. Um, as an entrepreneur, as a businessman is my three CS, a course, a community and a coaching practice slash consulting as well. But the course will, will launch, hopefully by the time this comes out.

Karaminder Ghuman: Uh, and then the course begins two weeks after that, and that is called Course Charisma. And then you can find that at coursecharisma.academy, and that is for those, it's a course where I'm showing everything I know about how to build and have, and foster connection over the internet with your audience.

Jesse: Nice. Well, we will make sure to have links uh, in the show notes, as well as a transcript of the episode. And you can also find that on the website, which is just adhdnerds.com. And yeah. Thank you so much for being here, Karaminder. It was, great to hang out and chat again.

Jesse: That's our show. Thank you so much for listening. I especially want to thank our VIP patrons, Luce Carter, Richard Stephens, Todd Barnett, and Dan Ott. It helps me do this show and the other work I do, so thank you so much for the support.

Jesse: If you want to support the show, you can go to patreon.com/jessej that's, J E S S E J. You can always support the show for free by leaving a review in Apple Podcasts, or Spotify, or the podcast player of your choice. Full show notes and transcripts are available at adhdnerds.com.